When I moved into my first non-college apartment, I lived with a friend I met through work. We were good roommates, had similar temperaments, like the same books/magazines/movies/TV shows, and got on well. However, within a week or so of living together we both noticed that even though our bedrooms were on separate ends of the apartment and we did not see each other as we were getting dressed we would more often than not be dressed either in the same color scheme or the same style of clothes. Not matching but we’d both have on tweed patterns or button-down shirts with a-line skirts.

Well after three years of harmonious roommating, she decided to move across the country. I live with a new roommate now and we rarely dress alike, but she and I have more dissimilar clothing styles in general.

However, this past week she came back to New York to visit for the holidays. She stayed with my new roommate and I for a couple of days. I had to laugh this morning when we had again gotten dressed in different areas of the apartment but each put on a green sweater with brown undertones.

My Namesake Came Out

Well I guess technically, I am her Namesake.

So the story, as I remember my parents telling it, as to how they decided to name their second little bundle-of -joy (me) is that they were flipping through the TV Guide and saw the listing for Family Ties that week. The mother, Meredith Baxter’s character was named Elyse, they liked the name.

This week, Meredith Baxter came out, announcing that she is a lesbian.

It’s totally bizarre and completely unfounded but I feel some connection to this woman just because I was named after a character that she used to play. I am very sensitive to any mention of her or Family Ties in the media, I want the show and her character to be received in a positive way –as if that were some reflection on me. To that effect I really respect the way she came out, and how she is handling the renewed media interest and invasion into her personal life.

So I will take this as quasi motherly advice/example to always be who I am and not care about what other people think of me.

High Flying and in the Right Direction

I haven’t blogged about trapeze lately, but please, gentle reader, don’t mistake that for any disinterest on my part, I am still very much addicted.

To be honest I had just hit a rough patch with it.

In September I started working on my swing --one of the most difficult parts of trapeze and what all instructors have insured me, that one spends years working on, for all intents and purposes it is the backbone of the swing. Flyers use their swing to build height, speed, power into their flight that gravity is doing its best to thwart, and physics is doing it’s thing in there too.

So I start working on my swing and it’s ok, respectable for a newbie like myself. Well then I didn’t take a class for several weeks, and it just fell apart. I was back when I should have been forward, hollowing way too early and only rocking from my waist, not my whole torso. It doesn’t matter if you didn’t follow all of that, just know it was bad and I received the well-meaning but frustrating advice of ‘starting over.’

To make matters worse, I started a new trick The Penny Roll, the trick is cool; I would swing out, sit on the bar like it was swing, and then roll backwards, flipping down to the catcher/net. My trick was good --the problem was I couldn’t catch it. I tried for 4 classes, and you only get two-catch attempts per class; so for two months I tried to catch this trick --never happened.

So I started over, simplified my swing till muscle memory kicked-in and the rhythm solidified in my brain and in my swing itself. It’s getting there, we’re back to respectable but still needs work.

Last night I learned a more advanced method of doing a trick I already knew and incorporating my swing into the trick. It’s not pretty yet, there is finesse that I need to work on but I got it, and caught it on my second try.

So, after these bumps in my road it feels great to moving in the right direction.

Family Fun

My Mom and Step-dad have been on a health-kick for the last couple of years, they joined a gym, starting drink or water than soda, and both started running. Everything they are doing --well it’s definitely working. I’ve gone to classes at their gym with my Mom, she’s twice my age but I’m the one sitting, trying not to throw-up on my shoes while she keeps going; a light shimmer of sweat the only sign that she’s winded at all.

So this Thanksgiving morning, my Mom, Step-dad, sister and I participated in Lake Mohawk’s 3rd Annual Turkey Trot, 5K race.

Now I haven’t run a 5K since high school and I only joined the cross country team then because I liked the people affiliated with it, not for any deep-seated love of running. My sister however, was the cross country queen, being a top finisher from her freshman year on. So needless to say, I was planning on both the race and my family kicking my ass.

I my whole game plan for this race was to go out hard and hopefully be in a decent position when I ran out of steam. From playing pick-up soccer in the park, and two-hand touch football all fall I knew my only chance was to go for speed rather than endurance --and work the downhills.

Well the race starts off, my Mom, sister, and I are deep in the back, probably a full minute goes by before we actually cross the starting line. In the beginning I was feeling pretty good, dodging small children, Dads with strollers, and the couple people running with their dogs in tow.

Unfortunately, for my mental acquity they had signs at each half-mile. There is nothing more disheartening than going along, feeling good, feeling strong and then you see that you’ve only run a mile --2.1 more to go. The mantra keep going, keep going, keep going, lasted till I reached the halfway point. Now I switched to plan b: power walk, run, power walk, run --where I would pick a sign post, telephone pole, landmark 50 or so feet in the distance. I was playing leap frog with some people around me who were doing the same thing, 2 10-year old boys, and 2 women in blue and pink under armour; but then the small children, Dads with strollers, and the dogs started that I had passed earlier started passing me.

At the 3rd mile mark, I glance over my shoulder and there is my sister, keeping a steady pace as I power-walked. Thanks to her, “Come on” I kicked the last 10th a mile in, while she got trapped behind a slower runner. I ended up finishing 7 seconds ahead of her. The little sister in me loves that for once in our lives I beat her at a race --I am sure that is the first and only time that will happen.

Official time 31:27:14

Business Travel

I have relatives who travel on business so frequently that it is a complete non-issue, and entirely commonplace. During casual conversations over dinner they cite their travels, this, this and this country; this, this, this, and this city, meanwhile they have named 3 European countries I would love to visit and 6 US cities I have never been to but would definitely be interested in going.

Personally, I have been excited about this trip to San Diego since I learned I’d be going 6 months ago. I LOVE traveling for work.

It’s a little cheesy but makes me feel more adult.

Like this morning when I was waiting in the security line, a TSA officer was making conversation and answering question for the people in line. He asked me where I was going, San Diego, and then for business or vacation, business. He then looked at me again a little more closely. Yes, I know I look like I’m in college with my jeans and flat shoes and ponytail but Oxford University Press is trusting me to represent our books to 6,000 foreign language teachers so there.

But even before I got to the airport, I love having a car pick me up and drive me to the airport. Even though it was 5:30 am and their was no one around to see it, I love that a black Lincoln Town Car was waiting for and when I stepped out the door,

“Car for you, Miss?”

“Yes”

“Here let me take you bag.”

And 35 very smooth and quiet minutes later I am at the airport.

And I LOVE having my own hotel room. This may be the only time in my life when I have my own bathroom, don’t feel compelled to make my bed, and can use multiple towels every time I shower. Yes, I reuse the same multiple towels the next time I shower. Such luxury! Also, as an active, rolling sleeper there is something nice about knowing I could rock, pivot, and roll an entire 360˚ and still be completely on my king size bed.

Eating alone in restaurants can be dull, but at the end I at least get to plunk down the company credit card. Hopefully it says to the waiter, who has been eyeing me eating along, I’m not lonely, I’m traveling on business.

The other part of it is, I’m going somewhere I have never been, and if it weren’t for this business trip I may never have had the reason to go. From all the recommendations and suggestions from friends and colleagues, San Diego seems like it will be a fun city and I am staying in an area I will not be able to personally afford for many, many years.

So, while there may be a day when it is commonplace for me to travel, here, here, and here, and go there, there, and there. I’m at the place right now where I am just going to enjoy it, and in case an Oxfordians read this I will be working very, very hard too.

New York is so different at 5 am.

All of the noise, the trucks, the car alarms haven’t started yet. The streets are empty and quiet. It’s dark, the wind blows leaves and paper in a silent swirl through the streets.

Driving over the Brooklyn Bridge, the lights of the city are still there, trucks, taxis, and town cars like the one I am in are the only vehicles on the road. The bridge seems busy but as soon as we enter Manhattan the streets are quiet and dark again. Very few people are on the street, apartments, shops, and restaurants are dark, and it is overwhelmingly quiet.

If New York is the city that never sleeps, well at 5 am it is at least at peace.

I think most people have a parent, grandparent, or family member of a prior generation that tells the story, “Well when I was a kid we had to walk to school, two miles, uphill, in the snow.” Well, for my progeny, here’s my version: When I was a kid, we didn’t have cable TV or a remote control. When I was a kid, if you wanted to flip between channels 2-13, you had a get up, cross the room to the television, and push the button relating to which channel you wanted to watch –and don’t even get me started on the internet or cell phones…

The much publicized 40th Anniversary of Sesame Street reminded me of this, my own watching Sesame Street days, and the other PBS shows I loved as a kid –and loved again when I found clips on YouTube yesterday.

While I know that I did, my memories of actually watching Sesame Street are extremely vague and I’m not actually sure they are memories to be honest. I do have very vivid recollections of reading, and re-reading Sesame Street books: There is a Monster at the End of this Book, Don’t Push the Red Button, and the Sesame Street version of Three Little Pigs with Biff the Builder. I can also remember a family trip to Sesame Place though I was probably only 3 or 4 at the time. My Mom likes to tell the story of little me, with my blond pigtails, in a blue and pink bathing suit, standing on my seat, singing along with the Sesame Street gang during one of the shows.

As I got a little older I have more distinct memories of watching, Where in the World is Carmen Sandiego and Wishbone. I looked up both of these shows on YouTube yesterday, the first thing that came back to be was the theme songs, which instantly re-imprinted themselves on my brain and psyche. For WitWiCS (as only the true fans refer to it), the TV show’s only pro over the computer game was the addition of Rockapella and their songs and jingles throughout the show. For Wishbone the theme song is less famous, but kitschier and therefore more easily stuck in one’s head. “What’s the story Wishbone…”

While I don’t watch kid’s TV anymore, it seems like these shows were a little smarter than what is popular today. Are there any kids game shows on anymore? WitWiCS was basically a geography quiz disguised as an international crime caper, and Wishbone was all about introducing literature and making the stories relatable. While there may be some educational minded shows for really young kids, smarter versions for the 6-10 crowd don’t seem to exist anymore.

Just makes me wonder –what are my kids going to watch?

In a feat of athletic prowess like I have never done before –two weeks ago at an Oxford Commas Zog Sports football I scored my first ever touchdown.

The play-by-play:
The Commas were down by 30 points and the second half was winding down –determined to go down swinging, as that is the Oxford way, we lined up on the line of scrimmage, Quarterback Robert calls the play, “The Eagle”. After the “set, HIKE!” I zig to the left, zag to the right, thwarting my meager defender, look up and Robert puts the ball right into my hands –two or three quick steps later I’m in the end-zone and the crowd goes WILD!!!!!

I’m not making any of this up –check out the video!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JPydgxmqIqs&feature=player_embedded

We ended up losing something like 36 to 18 –but I like to think I got the ball following for the late-game rally.

So every morning I get to Wiki-How-To’s Wikipedia’s version of the “How to” Their advice ranges from How to: make dresses out of t-shirts, Michael Jackson Halloween costumes, Apologize, and today’s is How to Have a Witty-Conversation.

http://www.wikihow.com/Have-a-Witty-Conversation

So their first suggestion is, when someone is talking to you –listen, think about how you want to respond, and then respond. It’s sad that this is given as advice, and sadder still that we need this as advice. There is an epidemic of people who speak without thinking a la Joe Biden, Sarah Palin, etc, but I don’t think it necessarily follows that thinking before you speak will make any comments wittier; however it may stop you from saying something really stupid, which in turn would make you a wittier conversationalist overall.

Their other comments make a reasonable amount of sense –referencing movies and current events, using metaphors, exaggeration, and/or sarcasm. However, their last comment also needs to be mocked –dress the part. Wiki suggests that dressing wittier, ie: wearing glasses, a beret, or an age appropriate sport-coat will make you a wittier conversationalist. Now I am all for dressing for the job you want but I’m not sure you can dress for the personality or conversational skill you want.

Manners 101

Ok boys and girls; let’s talk about manners, more specifically appropriate and in-appropriate responses in specific situations:

Example 1: You are a university professor who is interested in selecting a new book for the course you are teaching. The publisher of a book you were thinking of selecting very graciously sent you a free copy of that book, but you wanted more information so you wrote a note to the publisher and asked for confidential sales information. When the publisher politely responded saying that they could not send you the confidential sales information you should:

A. Not respond at all and the matter could end here
B. Send a polite response back saying, “Thank you for responding to my inquiry”
C. Reply that this will negatively affect your decision and thank the publisher for responding to you

Any of these would be appropriate responses in this situation. Now let’s see what actually happened:

The University Professor responded:

Rest assured then that your book will not be adopted at [School name]. Best wishes and go to hell,

Now class this is an example of a rude, over response. One can surmise that the University professor was frustrated by not getting the confidential sales information from the publisher, but even in times of frustration it is important to be courteous and respectful to people.

Let’s move on:

Example 2: It’s 8 am and you are a troubadour, evangelist, or homeless person riding the NYC subway, asking the other passengers for money, food, or their souls. Are giving your speech or performance you walk through the subway car holding out a receptacle for the other passengers to give you food/money/their souls. After receiving few responses you should do the following:

A. Get off at the next subway stop and enter a new car to try your speech/message/performance for a new group of people
B. Sit down or stand quietly for the remainder of the ride
C. Find a more appropriate venue for your message/speech/performance

Any of these would be appropriate responses in this situation. Now let’s see what actually happened:

The homeless man riding the NYC subway continues his message chiding people for their rudeness in not responding to him and questioning their mother/parent/or legal guardians’ parenting skills in the pedagogy of manners and polite behavior. Said homeless man then approaches a train passenger who is absorbed in reading and asking for a smile and a handshake.

*Now, a little aside from the main focus of this class, but this needs to be communicated: if you are a person who has stopped bathing for a length of time, it is unhygienic to then ask strangers on a train to touch your hands, especially during a pandemic flu outbreak.

Class, this is an example of being rude and invading someone else’s personal space. If you have delivered your speech/message/performance and people are not interested or do not willingly give you food/money/their souls/handshakes/smiles do not demand them and insult that person’s upbringing.

And finally class, let’s discuss Example 3: You are a teenage boy with your friend on a residential street at approximately 9 pm. You see a person walking down the same street pushing a cart filled with laundry. You find this person to be attractive and would like to pursue a physical sexual encounter or impress your friend (we at the testing facility couldn’t really tell what you were aiming at.) You should:

A. Introduce and talk to the person walking down the street before trying to pursue any sort of physical sexual encounter
B. Upon seeing that this person is busy with a laundry cart, not interrupt them and walk away

Either of these would be appropriate responses in this situation. Now let’s see what actually happened:

Teenage boy stops the person walking down street, rudely demands personal information, and then when the person walking down the streets refuses to give said personal information, call that person a rude name. Meanwhile your friend, who you may or may not have been trying to impress with this whole charade, has walked down the street in the other direction, clearly not wanting to be associated with you.

This is an example of being rude and embarrassing your friend, both of which show poor manners to the person walking down the street and your friend. This behavior should be avoided at all times.

This concludes this week’s class on Manners: Appropriate and In-appropriate Responses in Specific

Situations.

I just finished Dan Brown’s new book, The Lost Symbol. Frankly, it is exactly what it is supposed to be, page-turner thriller with lots of twists and turns, a crash course in symbols and Masonic history, and an ending where good triumphs over evil. While the end was a bit preachy for my taste, his millions of readers got exactly what they were asking for and they shouldn’t be disappointed.

What I find frustrating about the media swirling around this release are the critics who grasp for faults and write contrary reviews for the sake of being contrary. Take Maureen Dowd’s review in the Sunday Times Book Review. She had the following grips with Dan Brown

He is too kind to the Free Masons
(An organization that has been mislabeled and misunderstood for centuries, Yes Maureen, Brown should have been another voice to propagate rumors and allegations just to be a contrarian, pots-stirrer)
He used too many metaphors
(This isn’t journalism, or non-fiction in anyway. This is a quest-novel, popular thriller –so yes Brown used a widely popular and respected literary device. His metaphors weren’t even all that cliché.)
Not enough sex in the book
(I think this says more about Maureen than Dan Brown. Just because the ‘questers’ are a man and a woman it doesn’t naturally follow that they need to end up in bed together. Over the course of the book the two protagonists are hijacked by a mad man, have friends hurt and killed, are on the run from a mad man and the CIA, both almost killed, and go on a whirlwind historical tour of ancient mysticism but yeah somewhere in those 450 pages Brown should have had them go at it like rabbits.)

Dowd’s review can be found here: http://www.nytimes.com/2009/10/11/books/review/Dowd-t.html?_r=1&ref=books

But really I think Dowd liked the book and that’s why she had to grasp at straws to find something negative to say about it. Lately I’ve found all media critics automatically give any book, movie, TV show a bad review and I think it’s because they think that makes them a better, more prestigious reviewer. Why can’t you just say you liked the book/movie/TV show.

But because I live in a glass house and I have stones in my hand I have to admit, working in a prestigious publishing house surrounded by people smarter, wittier than I, I sometimes hide what I read or watch because I think those people will look down on me or it for being popular. But that stops today –in my free time I read contemporary fiction and most of that is mystery/thriller/quest novels. I watch cheesy drama TV. I like the puzzles and learning why people do what they do and it it’s not blatantly obvious I don’t try to figure out who the bad guy is or what the twist will be before it happens –I’d rather enjoy or be surprised by it as it does. I read what I read and watch what I watch because I enjoy it, not because I have something to prove to peers.

Ode to the In-home Washer and Dryer

For the last three years my roommate and I had the coveted in-home washer and dryer, when friends came to the apartment everyone gawked over the thing of wonder; people paid us to do their laundry in our apartment.

That was the good life.

Now that I have moved, while my new apartment is great, it does not have a washer dryer. I’ve done my laundry twice now at the laundromat; and both times it has been an experience.

The first time wasn’t so bad except I didn’t really know what I was doing. The aisles are tight and everyone has carts that need to get through so I was always in someone’s way. Then I loaded my clothes into the washer and went to pour the detergent on top of my clothes, like one does with every other washing machine I have ever used, an Asian woman who works at the laundromat comes running over “NO, no, no --on top, on top.” With these industrial washers you pour the detergent in the top so it releases during the wash cycle. That wouldn’t have been so bad if I didn’t have 10 pairs of eyes rolling at me at one time --stupid, white girl who doesn’t know how to do laundry.

Yesterday, after a rough day at work I was pushing my cart filled with weeks worth of dirty clothes, the sidewalk is uneven and the wheels on my cart caught. The cart tips forward, and I am trying not to fall onto the cart and the sidewalk so my arms are pinwheeling as I stumble forward. I do catch myself but crash my shins into the cart in the process. As I finish righting myself and the cart, I look up to see an older Russian man laughing at me, choking out “Are you ok?” between breaths.

“Oh graceful as ever” I replied.

“I give it a 9.5 --you missed something on the landing.”

I was so nice to do laundry while I cooked dinner, or on a whim when I wanted something clean and I found enough to make a load. So much easier.

Seriously Sarah Palin, Seriously

The fact that Sarah Palin would “write” a memoir is pretty obvious. The media and general public have been salivating over her and for it ever since John McCain announced her as his running mate. I guarantee it will be a top 10 bestseller for 10 weeks, selling hundreds of thousands if not millions of copies and make her publisher a lot of money.

What I can’t get past is why would any self-respecting person do that to themselves. the media has never been kind to her or her family. She quit being governor over a year before her term was up to get out of the media spotlight and maybe save her and her family so dignity. So why the memoir, to tell the story “her way” –please, she and the book will be fodder for late-night comedians’ merciless mocking as they again hunt for strings of non-related nouns formed into sentences, folksy aphorisms, and other ways to belittle her looks, intelligence, or experience.

Seasonal Shift

I wore a coat to work today. I’m drinking tea right now, simply because it’s hot and I am cold. Everyone around me seems to be coming down with a cold. I hate to admit but summer is over; fall is very much here, and winter is undoubtedly coming; and if the Farmer’s Almanac is to be trusted it will be a very cold one.

So depressingly I am now thinking of all the activities and plans I had for the summer that never happened.

• After Memorial Day I never made it to the beach again, subsequently I have a short/skirt tan rather than a bathing suit one. My inner lifeguard is so disappointed.



• Camping



• Bringing my NYC friend’s out to my country home(s) (also known as my parents’ houses) for some fresh air and to help dispel in New Jersey’s negative reputation

Maybe next summer…

I've had a very literary two weeks. Last week I went to Barnes & Noble for Philippa Gregory's reading and signing of her new book The White Queen which begins her trilogy on the Plantagenet rule in England. She incredibly smart and funny, we, the audience, laughed throughout her 45 minute talk and multimedia presentation. During the signing she spoke and asked questions with everyone. I was so impressed with how personable she was. I was equally impressed this weekend when my sister, Dad and I went to the National Book Festival listening to David Baldacci who mocked himself and his relatively new found fame when telling stories about absurd conversations with elderly women at while at a literary dinner sitting next to Pres. Bush.

However, there is the alternate side of the coin, authors who with fame have become so incredibly pompous that their while their books may be great I can't get past the incredible weight of their egos. Daniel Silva and his over use of the word "profound" to describe his own work falls into this category. Katherine Neville and her discussion of how the various secretaries at the treasury sought her out to do research for her next book as falls into this category.

Most authors describe their careers paths as starting with being a book nerd, each in turn describing how their commune with books, the library, or reading serendipitously lead them to literary fame. It's just interesting to see how that fame translates into continuous wonder/amazement/luck no matter how many best-selling, critically acclaimed titles they write; and that other's fame simple turns them into pretentious, self-aggrandizing, bores.

Book Party with no Books

On Monday a friend and I went to a book launch party for Alix Strauss’ new book Death Becomes Them about celebrity suicides. The party was impressive; it was at a great bar in Chelsea, had free signature cocktails, appetizers and chocolates, and everybody left with a goodie-bag full of alcohol, chocolate, make-up and other random goodies.

Only one thing was missing...The Book! The book wasn’t there and it’s already been published. While there is one thing I know about throwing a book party --you bring the book, you promote the book, you sell or give away the book! If anyone had walked into that party they would have no idea that it was for a book!

I was invited because I below to a group which promotes networking between people in the publishing industry but we are also frequently seen as good word-of-mouth people since for books like this we are often the targeted demographic. So here’s my word-of-mouth pitch --Harper throws a nice party, I was impressed with all of it but I can’t tell you anything about the book.

One-Catch Wonder Continues

In this last softball season, for three games in a row I made one really impressive catch. It would be one of those, running towards the ball, stick my glove out, and by some sort of providence the ball would land right in. Every single time I was surprised and excited that I had caught the ball.

Last Sunday was our first football scrimmage. We didn’t have a chance to practice this season like we did last year but as the entire team was returning so we ran a couple of play beforehand and started the game. Last year the team we played would have CRUSHED us --but this year we were better organized and we played smarter. We held our own, the final score was 38 to 31. My contributions were mostly on the defensive side, I played defensive line-man and tried to intimidate the opposing quarterback; on the offense side I missed a short pass. Then on a later play our female quarterback threw me the ball while I was in the center field. Time slowed down as I saw the ball come into my hands. The opposing team was guarding man to man so I made a dash for the end-zone. I didn’t make it all the way there but it was the most yardage I have ever made for our team.

Unfortunately that play wasn’t caught on video; but here’s one of me and my defensive glory.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vLYh7e319MA

Baby or a dog? Never played that game before

This past weekend I was wandering around my new neighborhood and I wander into the "Flatbush Frolic" which is a fairly typical street fair with belly dancers and slight-of-hand magicians. I was sitting outside of VoxPop coffee shop and I saw a women, mid-thirties, blond, walking with a small boy who was maybe three. Across her chest she was wearing a baby papoose and out the top I could see a small head with sandy hair; but the weird thing the head kept moving back and forth like it was shaking it's head no. But for the size of the head, the baby would be way too young to have that much head control and their were no feet or arms sticking out of the papoose.

Now I've played the "Is that a guy or a girl?" game before with passing strangers wearing loose clothing or with non-discriminating hair styles but this is the first time I ever played "Is that a baby or a dog?"

I didn't see the trio again so I have no answers to my little game.

Whirlwind catch-up

So it's been a really long time since I last blogged --but I do have an excellent excuse --I don't have internet in my apartment right now.

So here's whats been going on:

I'm adjusting to living in Brooklyn (its been a whole 10 days now) so far everything is great just working on the little things now and navigating Brooklyn both on and off the subway. This week will also be my first foray to the laundry mat which if nothing else should be an interesting study in sociocultural behavior

Flying is going well --at my last class I learned the one-handed take-off, started my swing (the most difficult part of flying) and how to take off my own lines. I fly again tomorrow after work.

I had a great Labor Day weekend --I got to see pretty much all of my family in two days, an old friend, and made it back to Brooklyn on Monday to BBQ with friends there.

I'm currently reading Keith Gessen's All the Sad Young Literary Men which could probably be re-titled ANGST!!!!! because that's all the main characters seem to be doing, but I will reserve my full comments for when I finish it.

I live here now!

So the final leg of moving went smoothly and I officially live in Brooklyn now. While it will take some adjusting to and finding a new routine so far it has been great. I love being so close to my friends and the park. On Sunday on my way to meet friends in the park I got to enjoy the sunshine for a 20 minute walk rather than an hour and a half on the subway. Then on my way to a friend's party that evening I was able to run home first because I was so close and still make it to the party in good time. I love having more space in my new room and apartment.

Now I just need to learn my way aroudn without the subway, buy a bike, and write a novel to be a regular Brooklynite?, Brooklynonian?

Last night I went grocery shopping at Trader Joe's for the first time and while I intellectually knew the store would be busy it wasn't till I experienced it that I truly understood. The checkout line wrapped entirely around the store. Cart traffic jams were common and there was definitely no chance of meandering aisle by aisle the way I used to shop. Although for all it's busyness the people there were very nice and the store/checkout is very efficiently run.

What I will miss about Hoboken #3

As the final entry in my "What I will miss about Hoboken segment" I will now extol the virtues of Empire Coffee and Tea:

The shop is cozy and inviting, the walls are lined with bags of coffee beans and there are only a couple of tables so it's never too noisy. The proprietors and baristas know the names, lives and orders of their regulars. Their prices aren't ridiculous! And in my Goldilocks opinion --Starbucks coffee is too bitter, Dunkin Donuts coffee is too sweet, but Empire's is just right.

I will miss them, but thankfully they deliver!

What I will miss about Hoboken 2

The PATH Train

Moving to Hoboken and taking the PATH train to work in the city daily has allowed me to live a car-free existence which I truly value.

While the PATH train has significantly fewer destination options it is in my opinion a nicer, more efficient system. The stations and cars are cleaner, one-way fare is $.75 cheaper than the subway, they have permanent ride cards that can be re-filled automatically online.

I have also mastered the fine art of dozing on the train and waking up at my stop, I can balance coffee, a book, and my bag without holding on; and I know exactly where the doors will open on the platform and the ideal car to be in at certain days/times.

Also, key in my mind, there is only one pan-handler that I have ever seen on the PATH. To me there is nothing more frustrating on the Subway than the constant berage of pan-handlers, troubadors, and evangelists. I have nothing against these people on the platforms, if I'm not interested I can just walk away but to be stuck in a subway car with them is agonizing. There are even some that are so bold as to get in our face and ask for money or a smile --I don't have either one for you and my book/iPod/magazine is infinitely more interesting.

What I am going to miss about Hoboken #1

The Hoboken Public Library

I returned my last books to the Hoboken Public Library tonight. Hoboken has a really nice library, the building is old and has this really established feel to it, it's three stories and the opening room with the reception desk has an atrium quality to it; there are pillars in really odd places so you sometimes have to wedge yourself between it and the shelves to get at the book you are looking for.

As part of the Bergen County Library system I have never wanted a book or movie that the library couldn't get for me and I have never waited more than three days for anything I requested. I doubt I will be able to say the same for the New York Pubic Library system.

Flying Trapeze #4

I flew again on Monday after moving most of my things to my new apartment.

The class went well, it was a good group of intermediates and new flyers. I'm still working on the split, I can't seem to stop bending my top leg. I also learned a new trick: The "Set Gazelle" --it feels a little funny after doing the split because I'm trying to arch in different ways but it looks pretty.

I also had a personal victory and cleanly caught a "Set Straddle Whip," my first clean catch with a non knee-hang trick. Unfortunately the video shows my first attempt when I didn't get the catch --it was too dark to film the second successful attempt.

Flying Trapeze: #3

Yesterday I took my third flying trapeze lesson. The class went well, the split I was working on last class is coming along much better and I even learned a new trick, the set straddle whip. However, catching didn't go so well as I would have liked. It's a completely different perspective catching with your hands on the bar and then letting go and being caught/falling. On my first attempt I got too excited let go as soon as I saw the catcher not on his command. My second catch was better; I waited for his commands but my arms weren't in the right position so he only caught me one-handed (he caught my other arm and I dropped safely back to the net. (see video). I'm glad I get to go back on Monday, that I don't have wait a couple of weeks to try again.

Also, in this class there were two 12-13 year old girls who reminded me so much of myself at that age, the super-skinny long legs, braces, and wearing mismatched socks and soffee shorts as a fashion statement. However, these girls caught on to everything really quickly, I was so jealous with the ease how they performed several tricks and made catches on their first try. I should have started trapeze at their age!

This week I read The Magicians by Lev Grossman which has been hailed by all critics as the “Harry Potter for adults” and while there are some basic magic type similarities the comparison should end there. The Magicians is not an adventure story like Harry Potter is, the quest is not the focus of the story; while there are scary beasts and monsters the real horror of the book is the demon within, and there is no clean ending to it, monster slayed all is right with the world ending. –I’m not knocking Harry Potter books I loved the series; I’m just faulting the comparisons.

I was impressed with the writing and the movement/pace of the book. Grossman has a keen eye for when to pay attention to the minutiae and when to gloss over vast periods of time. His writing style is brutally honest, quick witted (I think my favorite line of the book is when an older, mentor-figure student talks to Quentin after he has just been pummeled by a one-time friend; the mentor says, “Well anyone could have seen that coming, he was either going to hit you or start a blog.”) Grossman has built very real, fully-formed, and constantly changing characters into the book that you equally root for and curse at for the choices they make.

Like most magic books there is a moral/message to the story: Quentin time and time again is granted what he thinks his heart’s desire is but he is never happy. As a morose but intelligent boy whose bored by the prospect of college he gets accepted to magic school and learns to be a powerful magician not just someone good at slight-of-hand; he kinds love and friendship that flourish because of their individual differences not just their similar aptitudes; and he enters the world he could only read about during his childhood and fights in a quest to save that land from tyranny and destruction. All dreams realized but he is lost after difficulties and hardships mar his path and ends up at a fluff corporate job. The ending affords Quentin one more opportunity to pick himself up from soul-eating hum-drum; to make a quest and to hopefully make both moral and magical contribution; I hope he finally gets it.

Time Travel

I first read it in The Time Traveler’s Wife in 2004 and have likely read it about 15 times since. A gift from my sister, I was immediately drawn to it after reading the first page where Clare walks into the Newberry Library and her boot heels rap the wooden floor.

[Tangent] Experts say our sense of smell is one of the strongest memory triggers, well I would like to argue that sounds have the same influence. I grew up in a ranch-style home that was completely carpeted expect for the kitchen. However, I have this memory of my mother fixing breakfast in the kitchen, she’s wearing a classic 80’s style yellow dress with bright pink flowers and massive shoulder-pads, with tan heels (or pumps as she would have called them). As she crossed from the fridge to the stove, her heels rapped the tile floor and I began to associate that sounds with being a grown-up and going to work. To this day I am always conscious of the sound my shoes make on hard surfaces, especially at work; that smart tap on floors reminds me that by my own 3-4 year-old definition that I am a grown-up now even though my 25 year old mind would beg to differ. [End Tangent]

That Clare was also conscious of her heels on the floor I felt some instant kinship with her.

I don’t envy her life in the book, while there may be something to knowing from an early age that your life “works out” to a certain degree; that someone loves you, you have a home, work, and a child would be comforting in times of uncertainty but the day-to-day realities of life as a time-traveler’s wife and the hardships therein would be agonizing. To some extant she also loses her sense of free-will, that because she knows her tastes, preferences, and actions of the future she is obligated to that path for her future, which would feel like entrapment.

Instead, for me the book is more like a security blanket, when I feel lonely or at odds with romantic life I keep coming back to this book, this story of love, how they find each other, know each other, and how their love endures through loss. And while I could come up with some trite aphorism about how it reminds me that true love bears all things, it would be meaningless because I have never felt love like that. Instead reading and re-reading it allows me to escape my own feelings, I can fill myself with Henry and Clare’s story, their lives, their love; and come out on the other side in a better frame of mind.

Well they have now made my beloved book into a movie. I’ve watched a couple of advanced release clips and the trailer, and while my hands are constantly clenched in “that’s not how that happens,” “that’s not what this person looks like,” “they didn’t say that” frustration it has not abated my curiosity to see the screen adaption. So I went with my friend Lauren on Saturday for a girl’s dinner & a movie night.

Unfortunately I can't say much about the movie expect that they got the spirit of their love right; and while I completely understand that with the different media certain choices had to be made and aspects of the book needed to be cut out of the movie for the purpose of timing but the story lost some of its depth. If one had only watched the movie the story would be boy meets girl, boy time travels, boy and girl get married, have a baby and boy dies, boy time travels some more.

While Eric Bana had couple of really good scenes mostly his Henry just comes off as flat, he stays in one emotion throughout the entire movie although I think the screen writing really played a role in that. Rachel McAdams embodied Clare the way I see her when I read the book, she was the highlight of the film and don't even get me started on Gomez and Charisse...

I wanted to love this as a movie as much as I love the book but it just wasn't there. It seems like most movie reviewers agree with me; some more harshly than others. I love that some scholars also took the time to comment on how Niffenegger and movie makers got the physics of time travel correct. Here's the article if you are interested: http://www.slate.com/id/2225223/

Stoop Sale!

While I apparently missed the most interesting day working on Friday; our stoop sale this past weekend was a definite lesson in human nature and buying culture. We also finally met our neighbors after living here for 3 years and were busted by the cops.

Shoppers came in basically two categories; we had items on tables and in bins on the ground. Some dove right in happy to be shoulder high in a bin digging for the possibly perfect item at the bottom. These were mostly women 35-55, they would hold clothes up to them, try on hats and bags, test and turn over every item. Then there was the complete opposite type of shopper, they typically stood 10-15 feet back (which puts them between standing between parked cars on the street) they would then beeline for one item, turn it over in their hands once and either put it back or pay immediately; these were mostly men, all ages.

Our neighbors are really nice people with cute babies, dogs, etc. who were happy to discuss Hoboken's political corruption, various conspiracy theories, and the positive attributes of Portland, Brooklyn, and Hoboken.

We were busted by the cops for originally putting the sale up in front of a quasi-abandoned building next door; which we did in order to not block the sidewalk. While this hasn't been substantiated we think the owners(?) of the building called the police. There has always been something shady about that unused, prime-real estate location --my best guess is a mafia connection. So we moved the sale in front of our own building and had no other trouble.

All in all, it was a successful sale, we sold most of what we wanted to and were able to donate the rest.

Moving Advice

If could offer anyone any moving advice it would be this: Hire Movers!

Earlier this summer when I decided to move less than 10 miles away from Hoboken to Brooklyn I thought I would be economical, environmentally-friendly, and convenient that since I had a month to month my belongings that I could enlist family to help me move my furniture and that I could carry my smaller, lighter belongs across two rivers. So for the past couple of weeks I've been bringing a large tote-bag and my suitcase full of clothes, books, winter apparel and odds and ends with me to work in the morning and to Brooklyn afterwards. I have become painful aware of the following:

1. My easy 5 minute walk to the train in the morning becomes exponentially harder and longer when you are loaded down like a pack mule and at 8 am no wants to help you

2. Getting on/off the PATH/Subway involves at minimum 6 staircases

3. Manhattan is not flat, Madison Avenue is a definite hill

4. Clothes cannot folded as small as you would like them, books are really heavy when you try to carry multiples, and carry several bags at once doubles your girth when trying to navigate doorways and crowded sidewalks.

So learn from my example kids --hire movers.

Flying Trapeze: #2

First and foremost Flying Trapeze is amazing! I went for my second class on Friday and while it was a completely different experience from my first time being there it was incredible.

The class was a different atmosphere, last time it was a small class, all female, and all relatively athletic. This time I was part of a full class with an entire range of ages, sexes, and athleticism. The instructors were great and they let the one other person who had been there before and I fly a couple of times while the new comers were being instructed on how to leave the platform. After warming up with the knee hang skill from last time our instructor taught us a new trick, a split on the bar; which once mastered can turn into a catch.

Well I didn't master it. Be it my lack of dance training or limited flexibility I didn't get there. My legs weren't in the right position at the right time and with my hands on the bar I couldn't take my eyes off of it. Maybe it was beginners luck the first time where all the skills we worked on came rather easily. I was definitely frustrated not to get there this time.

I ended class successfully completing two knee hang catches.

But seeing all the other students gave me much more respect for the instructors and the difficult jobs they have keeping first-timers safe and playing therapist to those scared or frustrated by their performance.

Take the example of "The Attention-seeker"; she shows up to class scantily clad, flipping her hair around. After only paying some attention to the before-class instructions she has trouble getting off the board, fails to perform the trick, and lands improperly on the net --but it's her first time so everyone gives her a break. She goes up a second time with the same result. This time no one reacts as she comes down from the net so she does the obvious and starts crying. Well now she was the instructors stopping class to make sure she's ok, she rips her safety belt off, and continues crying to someone on the phone. When she is consoled by the instructors whose getting a break she then fakes a shoulder injury to explain her poor performance. Well now that the instructors won't let her go up anymore (they're not going to mess around if you say you're injured), she leaves with yes even more tears.

Then there was the skinny pre-teen boy with very little body control. His first time up he swings out and then when he tries to put his knees on the bar he instead goes all the way through so his hands are still on the bar, but the bar is now behind his butt. Not only is this position uncomfortable but it is also dangerous. So with the help of the safety-harness they have him let go and lower him down to the net. It all happened in a split-second.

These instructors really do need to be ready for anything.

Flying again in two weeks!

What happens to a dream destroyed?

Slate.com Michael Idov: Make that a Double Shot

So in one foul-swoop this article destroyed all of my post-my real career plans. Now what will I do with my golden years?

The original plan was in about 2050 or so once my “real” career was done that I would start a second life and open my own bookstore/coffee shop, someplace cozy in the winter and in the spring/summer I would envision it having a window/wall that completely opens so it would have that indoor/outdoor feel. I am essentially combining my favorite Hoboken coffee shop Empire Tea & Coffee with a small bookshop like Partners in Crime in the village. In my mind it is someplace very neighborhood-ish where I as the proprietor would know all the regular’s names, where local or debut authors would do readings, there would be a book club, and I could banish phones and laptops –my bookshop is only for reading.

Reading this article popped my perfect dream bubble with pragmatic concerns about rent and employee wages. Besides by 2050 we’ll all probably be reading e-books anyway.

I have the keys to my new apartment!

Its been a month of holding my breath and keeping my fingers crossed but everything worked out perfectly! I am now holding the keys to my new apartment in Brooklyn. All those who have moved apartments in NYC area know exactly what I am talking about and for those who haven't --well it's like a house made of cards getting everything to aline and work out; and there is always that threat of one even mild breeze and the whole structure collapses.

So now I begin the tedious process of moving. So thanks to the rain today I spent today trying to purge my belongings to try and move only what I will actually need/use/want. Now the packing begins. I'm glad I have the month to do it.

Facials

After years of acne problems I have a very strict rule about not touching my face and not having anyone else touch my face --the oils from my hands being more detrimental than stress or any other acne causers. So to this end I have always avoided facials or make-up trials. Until today that is...

Today my boss took me for my first mini facial at Origins. I LOVED it! It's akin to leg massages when you leg pedicures or having your hair washed before getting it cut. It's incredibly relaxing! I think I missed most of what the facialist was telling me because I was enjoying the massage.

So as a new convert I would recommend that anyone get the free mini facial at Origins, it was a great experience and they don't pressure you to buy anything.

WAHOO Conjunctivitis

Ok so as bizarre as this sounds when I woke up this morning with red, crusty, swollen eyes; well after the initial "oh crap I have pink eye again" I really had a fantastic day. I spent a grand-total of 30 minutes at the doctor/pharmacist getting eye drops and then had a random Tuesday off because of the whole contagious factor. I'm not in pain, I'm not tired, and I really got so much done today! and all really pesky errands (going to the DMV, grocery shopping, etc) that I would have spent a portion of my weekend doing that now I don't have to. So as far as having a legitimate illness where you have to be out of work I really recommend conjunctivitis.

Smiling...

So I was at a bar this weekend celebrating a colleague's 30th birthday and I start having a nice but banal conversation with this guy (where we're from, what we do, etc) and then he makes the comment that I have heard oh so many times before in one form or another "You should smile more," "You'd be so pretty if you smiled more."

Guess what --I'm not a puppet, I'm not performing for you; I don't smile all day long. Want to see me smile --say something interesting, funny, or give me an honest compliment. But telling me I should smile more makes me want to slap you --and then maybe I'll smile about that.

I flew through the air...

more or less with the greatest of ease.

And now for the catalyst that actually prompted me to start this blog. On Friday, as a birthday gift from Lora and Joe, I took my first flying trapeze lesson on top of Pier 40 in Chelsea, NYC overlooking the Hudson river.

After seeing it on TV and serendipitously running into while taking a boat cruise out of Pier 40 I knew I wanted to give it a try. So thanks to Lora and Joe's generosity I got to fly on Friday for 2-hours.

So after a very brief demo on the ground, I climbed the 30 foot ladder, placed all 10 toes over the edge, grabbed the bar, and flew!

It was an amazing feeling! I just swung out and lost every thought in my head that wasn't "I'm flying!!!!". I came out of the euphoria to listen to the instructors commands below. The first few swings we focused on swinging out, getting your knees onto the bar, letting go to reach for the catch, hands back to the bar, legs down, and safely fall to the net. Once I got that down I learned a back-flip dismount and ended the session successfully completing two catches. It is both incredibly easy and incredibly hard but all I can think about is how much I want to do it again.

Check out my complete photo album at http://www.flickr.com/photos/40812182@N05/sets/72157621743392455/

Back-tracking: 25 candles

Saturday July 11 marked my 25th birthday.

While normally I get very introspective around my birthday (and this year was no exception) in the end instead of trying to plan out the next year of my life and agonizing over the past year I should instead be grateful for my amazing family and friends; step-out of my comfort box a bit more, and enjoy life as it comes.

All in all it was great day, spending the morning with family and the nighttime with friends. Pictures to come.

Back-tracking: 4th of July 2009

Back from Seattle and after a quick 2-day work week where I more or less caught up on everything from while I was away, it was the 4th of July.

After a lazy morning I headed out to friends, Brian & Carolyn's apartment for a backyard BBQ and rooftop fireworks show with friends. Brian and Carolyn made a great meat-eaters/vegetarian/vegan picnic. On their rooftop we enjoyed a tremendous, Turner-esque sunset and fireworks from Brooklyn, Manhattan, and all along the New Jersey skyline. Because it was such a clear night we could see fireworks all along the horizon.

Back-tracking: Seattle, WA June 26-30, 2009

I continue with the other highlights of my summer so far.

In late June I traveled with my friend (and soon to be roommate) Dayne to her hometown of Seattle, WA. This marks my first trip to the Pacific Northwest; and it will definitely not be my last.

Dayne's brother and sister-in law were kind enough to let me stay with them even though they were in the midst of a massive home-restoration project. My first day we took they ferry to Bainbridge island, while crossing the Puget Sound I was completely struck by the beauty of this city, how green and lush everything was. While on the ferry, the clouds moved and Mt. Rainer appeared, faint almost like an apparition more than a snow-covered solid mountain top. On the island we rented bikes and explored the town. I haven't ridden a bike in ten years (thankfully it is true that you never forget) although I didn't really trust myself on the roads with cars whizzing by. After 4 hours we headed back to Seattle to meet with the rest of Dayne's family who had come down from Ellensburg. After touring the Wallingford neighborhood; Dayne and a high-school friend showed me the area by the Space Needle and we headed to a local pub.

The next day we met up with Lora and Joe, who included Seattle on their Northwest Tour. Dayne gave us a tour of the University area, her old neighborhoods, and Capital Hill. We then joined her family for a BBQ at Gasworks park, where the city has turned all their old steam pipes and hoses into works of art.

The following day we toured Downtown Seattle, walking along the river, through the sculpture garden. We had lunch at the famous Iver's Fish Market, while the fish was good the experience was terrifying. We sat out on the back patio and I felt like I was in the Hitchcock film "The Birds"seagulls swarmed to snatch french fries from the hands of patrons and then without warning would fly off, but just as quickly swarm back, circling overhead and landing within inches to try and nab my lunch. After lunch we headed to Pike's Market, a shopper's heaven of fresh fish, fruit, flowers, and souvenirs.

On my last day there Lora, Joe, and I took the "Underground Seattle" tour by a man with a striking resemblance to SNL's Norm MacDonald. With dry wit throughout we learned how Seattle was once built on a flood plain, so that with every incoming tide the ground and streets would be soaked, and the painstaking process of overcoming this. We wandered downtown a little more, coming across the Seattle Mystery Bookstore (I dragged Lora and Joe in of course) and a quick lunch it was time to head home to NJ.

My overall impressions: Seattle is a beautiful city that is a perfect balance of metropolitan excitement and nature. But how can I not love any city so populated by boats, bookstores, and coffee shops.

Check out my complete album at: http://www.flickr.com/photos/40812182@N05/sets/72157621849090186/